I was reading on a couple of other blogs tonight about being perfect. I so can relate to those people who have written about it. This thing we call parenthood is difficult and I so wish someone had a manual to give out when you have children, it would make it so much easier.
I have my doubts about a lot of things. Like am I a good wife?? Am I doing the right thing by my children?? Is Sam going to get better? Why doesn't that damn pile of laundry go away EVER?? I could go on and on and on.............you get the picture.
I really don't have any friends that I can confide in. I have a hard time making friends, I don't know why but I do. And the friends I do have seem to think that I'm all put together and have the best of things. I DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I just know how to hide things and I hide them well.
We all have problems with this and that and I get that. I just want someone to listen to me and not judge me or make the problems I have seem less than what they really are. It's hard to talk about these things with my husband because he has his own stressors and I don't want to make him miserable. Plus the things that are bothering me, they are bothering him too and neither one of us know how to fix it at the moment.
I wish someone could come to my house and clean it, do the laundry (and I mean ALL of it) and make dinner. But the reality of it is, it's up to me. I know I'm not perfect and sometimes I feel like I have to keep up with the Jones' but again reality sets in and I know I fail miserably.
There are things that I can do or in control of and those are the 3 kids I brought into this world and to me, they are perfect. I can love my husband to no end and to me that's perfect and I know (even though he doesn't say it much) that he loves me and that's perfect.
Everything else will just have to be the way it is until I can get around to it.