Christmas time huh?

So I've been seeing Christmas this and Christmas that since the middle of October.  And frankly I'm sick of seeing it.  This has been a very long and hellish year for me and my kids and I just want the new year to start already.

Christmas had always been my favorite holiday (besides Halloween esp. for the candy). My dad would go and get the fake tree from the attic space in the house one day and slowly over the next week or so, a Christmas tree would magically appear.  My parents and I would put up the ornaments and remember where we got them or who gave them (usually to me), etc.  I always got to open the Christmas cards that would show up in the mail, etc.  One year, my now 18 year old daughter, put the fake candy garland in her mouth.  It was funny...

I even got married right before Christmas, why? not sure..but I did. We kept on forgetting every year because of the holiday so we usually celebrated (if we did at all) in June. Do I recommend people get married RIGHT BEFORE Christmas? NO but it's really up to you.  If I had to do it over again, I would certainly pick a day in June or some NICE month. 

Over the years, babies were born, relatives passed away and so on.  My father-in-law passed away on December 15, 2002. So needless to say, that Christmas was weird.  It seemed like every Christmas season someone in the house was sick and I didn't go to the in-law Christmas. Which was fine, because I always feel out of place there. I don't know why, I just do. 

Then my dad passed away in 2003. Since then I haven't been able to fully enjoy any holiday, especially Christmas.  I don't know why I can't shake this but it is what it is.  This year is beyond strange. I filed for divorce, he's still living here, kids are confused beyond all belief, and I'm basically living in the finished basement (which I should not have to but I do)

Things just don't feel Christmas-y around here....

Not sure what to do.....

So, I went to my dermatologist the other day due to a skin infection that was not getting better on it's own. It still amazes me that now, after living with this disorder/disease for 40 years it's just within the past 5-10 years or so that these doctors KNOW what I have and the prognosis is still the same....none...sigh.


Anyways,  I get the common lecture of "have you tried this?  or that? and what were the effects of it?" .  But this doctor gave me a little bit of hope that I just might take him up on.


I was on a clinical drug trial for Accutane when I was 9 (yes you read that right) and this drug actually made me worse than I am.  Dry eyes, drier skin, etc.  Not fun.  And I swore that I would never ever go on anything Accutane related ever again.  Dr. Huang at Froedert Hospital made me think otherwise.  The drug Soritaine was brought up to me several years ago by a different doctor and they scared the crap out of me by listing everything conceivable that could go wrong and never really answered MY questions about it.  They were TOO excited to put me on this drug.  Needless to say, not only did I not go on this drug but I found a different doctor all together.  Hate doctors and practices like that.. Hate Hate Hate.


As I've been getting older, I'm finding out that my skin is actually MORE painful as the season change/weather fronts come and go, etc...Now I'm having a hard time doing the simple tasks of writing with a pen, holding on to a cup or glass with one hand (now I have to use both hands), grocery shopping is a joke - I usually have to bring Nathan with me.  Although he doesn't mind helping me, it's the fact that I need the help more often that is freaking me out.


So back to my dilemma.  Soritaine can make it possible for me to move my hands more freely, the gross skin on my feet could be less, etc.  The doctor said we could start on baby amounts and work up rather than starting at a HUGE dosage and trying to taper down to where it's beneficial.  And yes, there would be monthly vistis to the doctor's and lab work (nothing that I've haven't been through before and will go through for the rest of my life).  But the way I am now is the only way I've ever been, it's the only way I know how to do things. How does one go from being a certain way physically for 40 years and then have the possibility of have "nice" skin? How does one function with the"new" skin??  Is it even worth it at my age? I'm in no way saying that 40 is old. nope not at all....that last question was a weird one but it needed to be asked.


If you were me (not that I wish this disease on ANYONE) would you try a drug that could make your life easier or no?


Hugs
Kelly

The Climb....

And NO I'm not a Miley Cyrus fan AT ALL.  I was listening to the song on the radio, and the lyrics said something to me.  


It's doesn't matter what is on the other side of all this crap I'm going through - it's about the climb to get there and no matter how many times I may fail, I will get there.  It just takes time.

video from YouTube....


This is my inspirational (pop) song for the moment. Can you say, Kelly has this on replay on her Iphone?? hee hee.


Hugs,
Kelly

Monday? Again? Venting - ignore if you want,.

So it's Monday.  Frankly I cannot even remember what the heck I did over the damn weekend. Why? you ask.  Well, my weekend went something like this:


1. Weather changes in Wisconsin are horrible, thus.. Kelly lives on pain killers, anti-nausea meds and lots of sleep.

2. Kids are NO help during this time.  I'm lucky if I remind ONE of them to throw a load of towels in the machine.  Nichole was playing video games with her friend online...ALL WEEKEND! So needless to say, I couldn't even catch up with my DVR'd shows.  Sucks..:(

3. Sam was feeling awful again due to the weather changes.  I wish I can make him better, but I can't.  Sucks..:(

And I wonder why I feel awful this time of the year.  It's partly due to the fact that I have a hard time with the holidays and the other part is that THE SUN IS NOT OUT AS MUCH!!!!  If I could afford it, I would live someplace other than here during the winter months.....must. look. into. that.

Sorry for the vent.  I needed someplace to complain to....

It's Fall, I know but.....

 So back in August, when Nichole had her Senior Pictures taken at this fantastic park in Cedarburg right by the lake, I took this picture.  I loved the way the trees looked when I looked up.  It was one of those, "I have to capture this NOW" kinda moments.

 The other picture is obviously Lake Michigan but I like how the walking trail goes right along the bluff.  It was SO pretty ( a tad warmish but who cares).




 

How I wish it was still warm out and the trees were full of these beautiful leaves.  But nope, it's Fall and the trees barely have any leaves left on them, it's windy and getting colder by the minute here. Yuck!!

Pretty soon the snow will fly and we will be stuck in the house for what seems like FOREVER, because winters in Wisconsin last AT LEAST 6 months or so. I just hope we don't get a huge amount of snow this year.  I'm seriously thinking about moving to someplace warmer than this crap.  I'm SO done with Wisconsin winters.

Nichole - Senior Pics and other stuff....

Hi there,

While I've been NOT blogging a few things have happened in this house.

1.  Nichole turned 18 at the beginning of October.  She also had to order her cap/gown/tassel for graduation in June of 2012.  I cannot believe that I have an 18 year old now.  What happened to the cute little baby that I brought into this world 18 years ago?  If I would have known THEN that I would have raised such a responsible, independent girl, I would have told you that you were NUTS!!  I'm grateful for having her in my life.

2. The above pictures are a few from her Senior Picture shoot back in August.  I think they turned out wonderfully.  Since then, she has cut her hair short again but I'm glad she had the long hair for her pictures.  I cannot thank Ken Chartrau enough for his time and expertise with these pictures. 

There have been other changes in my life but I will not get into that right now.  It's still too raw to talk about.  But I will, eventually.

Enjoy the pictures!
Kelly

Ecommerce Position

Have you ever wondered how people get ideas for gifts, products to try, etc.? It's usually a recommendation from a tweet, post on Facebook or some other blog that you just might happen to stumble upon.  


Recently, I had to research a product out because the current product I was using stopped working.  Since I read my Twitter feed and Facebook feed on a regular basis, I found a wealth of information there.  The product I was researching out was a new body moisturizer because the current one I was using stopped working AND was discontinued. 


I got some GREAT recommendations for a cream called CeraVe. I had never heard of it but I thought I would give it a try.  Bought it and tried it. Worked beautifully!!! Great advice from those feeds...  I also try to recommend products, services, etc. to others not only because they are asking for suggestions but I found out that the more suggestions you have, the better the result will be.


Why would I be a good choice for this position?  I have experience in researching products before recommending them, I love to try products before recommending them and besides having the opinions of working people, the opinions of a stay at home parent are just as important..


http://vendio.com/

Ecommerce Writer